Sweatiquette - 5 Solutions to Sticky Situations

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New York Daily News - August 2, 2006

By Joe Piazza

As temperatures creep toward 100 and the humidity is thick as soup, maintaining your sense of dignity in the swelter is key. It's time for sweatiquette.

There is no getting around the summer soak, but what is the protocol for public touching during the drippy months?

"Our tolerance for things like sweat and body odor is a little higher in the summer," says etiquette expert Samantha von Sperling. "But not that much higher."

DRIPPING DILEMMA: You're confronted with a sweaty friend who wants to give you a bear hug after he's ben percolating on a subway platform for 20 minutes. A normal greeting suddenly turns supremely awkward as you see the drops glistening on his brow and dripping down his neck. Suddenly, fear grips you, as you are forced to encounter the beast in front of you. There is no way out.

DON'T SWEAT IT: "If somebody opens their arms to you and they're all wet, if you refuse the hug you are the etiquette offender," von Sperling says. But the alternative is the "forearm grab." It's like the hug equivalent of the air kiss. "You lock forearms, keeping your bodies away from each other," von Sperling explains.

DRIPPING DILEMMA: You'd like to curtail the moisture but are unsure what level of personal sweat management is okay. Fanning oneself? Fully mopping the brow with a bar napkin?

DON'T SWEAT IT: "This is a good time to bring back the fashion of hand fans," suggests von Sperling. "They are elegant and fun and keep you from sweating. You do ultimately want to try to manage your sweat as best you can. If you know you have a sweating problem, then it is a good idea to carry around a handkerchief or fan so you aren't using napkins from the table."

DRIPPING DILEMMA: You're the yucky one and dripping wet.

DON'T SWEAT IT: Issue preemptive sweat warning. "Tell the person, 'I would love to hug you, but I'm very sweaty,'" von Sperling says. "Try not to remark on how hot it is when you're sweating profusely - people can see you are uncomfortably warm. Don't make it less comfortable by making that remark. And never say, 'I'm sweating like a pig.' Pigs actually do not have sweat glands."

DRIPPING DILEMMA: What is the protocol when you start getting hot and heavy when it's actually hot and heavy? Sweating in the bedroom is a given, but dropping buckets while getting down isn't always the sexiest!

DON'T SWEAT IT: "Once you're naked and having sex, anything goes," says von Sperling. "If you are in your own environment - the person is a guest in your home - then you can arrange things like fans, A.C. or even have a hand towel handy to help control the situation. If you are in somebody else's bedroom and you have never had sex with that person in very hot weather before, then joke about it beforehand. Say, 'I'm warning you [wink, wink], I might work up quite a sweat.' Ultimately, when things are hot and heavy, sweat happens!"

DRIPPING DILEMMA: You drip sweat on someone.

DON'T SWEAT IT: "If you should sweat on somebody, simply say, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to sweat on you,' and offer them your handkerchief to mop off the droplet," says von Sperling. "If someone is sweating, it's not really their fault. They're not trying to gross you out, so be a little humane about it."

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